Tree of Finches

Little birds chirping about big things

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Two Additions

Posted by A birch tree on June 3, 2008

I’m in a funk, still being given the runaround about my pay disparities and my discharge, still being given bullshit work assignments, still being put on watchbills I’m not supposed to be on, and still feeling dirty after writing out all the awful comments I’ve overheard without saying much of anything.

So I don’t have much to post, except two new comments I heard today that I did, in fact, respond to:

Situation one:
Dude A: “There has got to be a better way to get these creases into my dress uniforms.”
Dude B: “There is. Get married.”
Me: “Dude, do your own fucking laundry, you lazy ass.”
Dudes A&B: [nervous laughter. I put out my cigarette and leave.]

Situation two:
Dude X: “I heard they were talking about a pilot program to test out an all-female submarine crew.”
Dude Y: “The sub would have to come back right out of the docks, because they’d kill each other in three days.”
Me: “Actually, they’d probably get qual’d in half the time men do because they’re not doing stupid shit like ‘The Brain’ to each other or making the skips eat San#2 Sandwhiches and put their cocks on silver pipes.”
Dude Y: “…uh… I dunno. Did you see the Red Wings last night? Triple overtime!”

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