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Humans: We Kill Everything, Even Ourselves!

Posted by A birch tree on April 20, 2008

Still no consistent internet, as I’m sure you can surmise. My goal is to have access back by monday afternoon. We’ll see how that works out for me.

Until then, here’s an article for discussion: High Levels of Household Chemicals Found in Pets, which is a bit of an understatement if you read the article. It should be “Killing Puppies and Babies are Bad, Except When Du Pont Does it for Us” or something.

You, friendly adult human, have a certain level of environmental toxins running through your bloodstream. Things like chemicals leached into your soda pop from the plastic bottle it’s contained in (“Forever In A Landfill, Forever In Your Urine”), growth hormones from your beef, fecal coliform in your oysters, flame retardants from your carpets, and whatever the hell that stuff is in perfume that makes it stick to the little hairs inside your nostrils for an hour after you’ve left Bath and Body Works being just a few examples. They all cause cancer, illness, reproductive nonsense, and lots of other happy fun things. Let’s say this level is X.

Your dog, and any other household pet or family member that spends most of its time on the floor putting random objects into its mouth, has a level of toxins that is roughly equivalent to 20X. Give or take.

Lovely, isn’t it? Do we even bother to think a little bit ahead, as humans? I mean, fuck, how long had Teflon been around before we found out it was deadly? And I don’t have time to find the citation yet, but we’ve been using cell phones for how long before we finally admitted they cause cancer? One technician was quoted as saying something like the red blinking light on top of the tower is more stringently regulated than the radiation from the tower itself.

Congratulations, Humanity in general and the Masculine Drive Towards Ever-Increasing Scientific Pogress that we Don’t Want to Wait and Test and Make Sure it’s Safe Before we Inject it Into the Environment in Vast Quantities, specifically. You’re succeeding in the most convoluted long-range suicide attempt in the history of the universe. Which wouldn’t be an issue, really, if you weren’t so hell bent on taking everything else down with you.


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